BUY, BUY, BUY

Task 48, December 13 to December 20

"Whoever said money can't buy you happiness didn't know where to shop." Unknown

Ok, it's the holiday season--a time of joy, happiness, family, and above all--BUYING things!!!

I don't know what to buy anyone! Especially my wife! I might if I paid attention during the year, but no. I have no earthly idea of what she wants, so I end up getting something she has no need for, AND I'll spend too much money on it.

Which is what happened again this year. I bought her an air fryer and some hair twists. I'm doomed...

At least there's Amazon. I'm still a horrible shopper, but at least I don't have to leave the house.

I've just never been one for shopping. It takes too long, there are too many people, and if you're with your wife, you will inevitably have to try stuff on, which is beyond tedious, and frankly it just feels like a chore. Actually it feels like punishment.

My wife, however, and my mother (a prolific shopper in her day. We lived in a small town where shopping options were limited, but she wasn't deterred by availability, or distance--she would drive to Cleveland or Erie is there was a sale), and my sister as well, they find shopping to be an excellent way to wile away the hours. My wife says that shopping, especially shopping for clothes, makes her feel good. As in, if something is bothering her, she goes shopping and spends some cash, and comes back with a smile on her face and a song in her heart. Retail therapy, that's what she calls it.

Well, I had a particularly awful day recently. The kind of day that began with a flat tire, ended with a bill from the I.R.S., which bookended a visit to the urologist...

I went to McDs to ingest a bit of grease to make me feel better, but the Big Mac I devoured left me salted-out and peevish. So, on a complete whim, I decided to try a bit of retail therapy...

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I got some cash from the ATM. I took $200. I went downtown and roamed around. Not really sure what to do. Should I buy myself a pair of pants? Nope. A wallet? Hell no--I get a new one from my kids every year on my birthday. I had to shop for something special. After a while I ended up in front of a music store. It's one of those places that sells guitars and drums and instruments for the school band, like trombones and cornets and such.

I went in. One hour later I walked out with a banjo and a case for the banjo. Do I play a banjo? No. Can I learn to play a banjo? Probably not, but I guess I'll try.

I went home with a grin on my face. I showed the banjo to my wife and she snorted, then shook her head and said, "you need pants", and walked away.

TASK:

Buy yourself something. Something for yourself. Something you want. Something not necessarily practical. Something that makes you feel good.

But there are rules:

Rule 1. You can't shop on-line or use a catalogue or shop at HSN or QVC . You have to go somewhere. A store. A mall, whatever.

Rule 2. Set a dollar limit. You ain't getting a Ferrari no matter how much you want it. You can't spend more than you can afford because you'll feel bad after you buy whatever you're going to buy and the point here isn't to feel bad. Measuring stick: the amount you should spend should be the same as you bring to Vegas to lose.

Rule 3. Don't run out and buy the first thing that you see. Shop a little. Slow down. Rule of thumb--don't buy anything that your kids are going to give you on your next birthday.

Rule 4. Pay with cash.

Rule 5. Go shopping by yourself.